Fatally Yours
by VikiBUG
Summary: What if Ari hadn't killed Kate outright. What if she was fighting for her life in hospital. How would the team say their goodbyes. Will be a multi chapter fiction. Please read and review with ideas. Thanks.
1. Chapter 1

Gibbs paced up and down the hospital corridors

Gibbs paced up and down the hospital corridors. The pale green tiled floors echoed under his feet. The white walls were supposed to make the corridors wider but to Gibbs it just felt like they were enclosing on him. He could smell the strong scent of antiseptic which brought tears to his eyes. It shouldn't have been her, not his Kate. Gibbs looked at his watch, it had been 20 minutes, the doctor should have been done by now, he wanted to go in and sit with her again. He couldn't bear the thought of his Kate waking up with no one she knew beside her. It was all his fault, she wasn't even supposed to be working it was her day off he shouldn't have told her to come in. To the people surrounding him he probably looked like a guilty boss trying to ease his own pain and find the answers he desperately needed. The truth was he did feel guilty but for entirely different reasons than one might expect. He almost felt guilty for hiring her in the first place, if she didn't work for him, with him, this would never have happened. He quickly disregarded this thought though, ever since she had been working at NCIS he had begun to smile more. She was good at her job, had an inquisitive mind, and was good at putting even the most puzzling cases together. However Special Agent Caitlin Todd was more than that, she was the heart of the team the one person who glued them together at their lowest possible moments. The fact was that widow and 3 time divorcee Jethro Gibbs was in love with her, and the only thing he had to be guilty of was never telling her the truth, of pushing her away before she got to close because he didn't want her to be the next Shannon. The stupid thing, the really stupid thing was that it had happened anyway, all the time he spent pushing her away didn't change a thing. He had sent McGee back to headquarters an hour ago, surely he should have found something out by know.

Gibbs resumed his pacing. Up and down, up and down, up and down. The noise was almost therapeutic, almost. He decided to sit down before he began to annoy the people surrounding him as much as he was annoying himself. It was times like these he began to question everything in his life. Although this made him feel selfish, Kate needed all his attention at a time like this. Perhaps if he talked about things other than work he would know who to phone in times like these. Doctor Clay walked out of Kate's room, and made his way over to Gibbs. He walked with the sort of quick precision that all doctors had, Gibbs often found himself wondering if they taught doctors how to walk, and how to have illegible handwriting at college.

"_Caitlin is still unconscious at present; you can go sit in with her now. Trying reciting stories that you may have shared, sometimes a familiar voice can do wonders. Although Mr. Gibbs I do have to prepare you for the worst possible scenario, there is a chance that she will not wake up. The surgery was successful as far as we can tell __but we will know more in the next few hours. Her chances could considerably increase if she makes it through the night, but she does have a big fight on her hands." _The doctor said placing a comforting hand on Gibbs' shoulder.

"_Thank you doctor"_ he replied with a small smile. Tony had gathered the evidence and taken it to Abby's lab a couple of hours ago, maybe she had found something out already. He pulled out his cell phone and dialled the lab.

"_Hey Abs, have you found anything yet?" he inquired. _

"_Well I have analysed the shell casings that Tony brought me, looks to me like they came from a .338 Lapua Magnum, our perpetrator could be an ex military sniper I think he intended the bullets to skim Kate and not hit her directly, you only have a gun like this if you know what your doing. I have requested a list of whom these guns were issued to in the U.S army. Now because I know the type of gun I have been able to limit the search area to within a maximum of 1,600 metres. That's all I have at the moment Gibbs. Sorry."_

"_No Abby, you've done great, let McGee know your findings, tell him to limit the search area, look for anywhere surrounding our position that couldn't be seen. Anywhere our perp could have hidden. Let me know if you find anything else okay?" he said, he knew Abby wanted to ask about Kate, he also knew she would be worried, but they had to do their jobs if they could find out who tried to shoot Kate then she would be safer. _

"_Of course Gibbs. How's our girl doing?" Abby almost whispered, she knew what she wanted to hear, but what she needed was the truth and she knew Gibbs would be the on person who wouldn't sugar coat anything. _

"_She's still unconscious Abs, The doctor doesn't think she'll make it through the night, but Kate will prove them wrong. She's one of us, a fighter Abby she'll prove them all wrong. Just you wait and see" he whispered, tears springing into his eyes. _

"_Yeah your right. I was wondering if I could leave early to come down and see her. I'll bring the files with me, I can keep working, I'd just prefer to see her myself if that's okay." She asked, Gibbs could hear her try and control her emotions._

"_Of course Abby, I'll see you here later" he said as he disconnected the phone. _

He made his way over to Kate's room. The door shut behind him with a soft click. He pulled up one of the small plastic chairs, the kind that looked like they were made for kindergarten children, or perhaps it was because the hospital really didn't like people visiting sick relatives and the chairs caused so many back problems that they would leave, or perhaps it's the back problems that paid the nurses wages. He shuffled closer to her bedside and that was the first time he got a good look at her. Her eyes were closed and her milky skin was paler than usual. If it wasn't for the wires everywhere she would look like she was sleeping peacefully, like an angel in one of those Disney films he often watched with Kelly. At present he decided he should probably think of some comforting words in case she could actually hear him. He was never one to be lost for words but when it counted he never really knew what to say.


	2. The Truth Gibbs

"I never know what to say to people in their time of need

Gibbs took Kate's hand in his and decided it was now or never.

"_I never know what to say to people in their time of need. I'm not even sure you can hear me, but if you can know this Kate, know that you have to make it through, know that you are loved, know that you are wanted and respected, and know that you can always and I mean always Special Agent Todd beat Tony at anything as long as you believe in yourself. All the rules that I have made up over the years have been to keep people like you away from me, so that I couldn't hurt you, or perhaps it's so that you couldn't hurt me. You broke them all Kate, and the funny thing is I bet you didn't even know you'd done it. The doctor said I should talk to you, that a familiar voice might help, so I guess that's what I'm going to do and as I know you are curious as to how you broke my rules, I'll go through it with you, as long as you promise not to tell anyone or hold it ag__ainst me ok._

_Our little secret, which leads nicely into rule #4 the best way to keep a secret is to keep it to yourself, second best is to tell one other person, which I guess I am about to do. I kept everything a secret from you I was hoping a time would come to tell you, but I never did feel quite brave enough, I'm a coward, I guess now is a good a time as any though to tell you how in love with you I really am. I'm head over heels, absolutely stark raving mad in love with you. Every time I work on a case with you my heart beats faster, I want to protect you. When you get hurt or are upset I want to hold you close and tell you everything will be fine. When Tony picks on you I want to slap him around the head. When Ducky gives you advice and makes you smile I want to offer him a million pounds. When Abby takes you on a girl's night out I want to remind her not to get you into trouble and hug her at the same time for being a good friend. You are everything Kate, you are worth everything to me and you can't let a doctor who looks as if he has just graduated from med school, and is still living with his mother tell me that you won't make it. I don't believe it for a second. _

_Rule #8: Never take anything for granted, I took you for granted Kate. I took for granted that you would always be there by my side, that I could always tell you the truth tomorrow, that there would always be a tomorrow, and now perhaps there won't be, the thought of not seeing you smile at me __again is killing me. It hurts more than you can ever imagine. _

_Rule #12: Never date a co-worker. This rule only existed because I didn't want you to become a target like Shannon and Kelly. I've never told you about them though have I? Well the truth is Kate I was only ever divorced three times. When I was a Gunnery Sergeant on tour in Kuwait my wife Shannon witnessed a murder and her and my daughter were placed under protection. They were on their way to a safe house of all places, when the driver was shot dead causing the car to crash and they were killed outright. Losing them was the hardest thing I have ever had to cope with so I shut myself off emotionally. My other wives I suppose were there because I was trying to compensate for my loss, they all shared characteristics with Shannon but they weren't her, I probably sound like a worthless form of a man and perhaps I am, but I'm not the only one to blame, I strongly believe they were only there because my pay checks were good enough to support us both, none of them really loved me and I wasn't willing to love them enough for them to stay. Then you came along, and I realised I did deserve to be happy you talk to me like I was human, like I mattered and it made me see that I was able to love again. Only the pain reminded me why I couldn't be with you so I kept enforcing my own rules, not to hurt you Kate, no I never meant to hurt you, but so I wouldn't get hurt again. _

_Finally one of those rules which you all have drilled into your head, but yet it doesn't have a number. Never say you're sorry. Kate apologising doesn't make you weak, I just never wanted you to apologise to me, no matter what happened on cases or after cases you have never done anything wrong, and anything I may have said was just to isolate myself further. But I am the one who made a mistake and for that I am sorry. I keep asking myself why you took this bullet for me, maybe it was just your loyalty, the same fierce loyalty I have to the team. Though part of me hopes it was another reason entirely, now you have to wake up Katie girl just to let me know. _

_There are so many places I wanted to take you. I have a little cottage in my home town; well it's more of a village. So many people there want to meet you, the girl that made me happy again. __We can sit in front of the log fires and tell each other stories, or watch films anything you like. Then I can take you to the restaurant, or the theatre, or maybe just a walk to the beach. There are so many things I want to share with you. So many demons I know I will need your help to bury._

_Just promise me that you won't stop fighting."_

Gibbs wiped the tears from his eyes, and felt a comforting hand on his shoulder her turned to face Abby who was standing beside him her own tears threatening to spill. He pulled her in for a hug, telling himself she needed the support when really it was himself who was longing for the comfort. He bent down and kissed Kate on the head, pushing her hair out of her eyes,

"_Get better Kate, that's not a request it's an order."_ With that Gibbs left her room in search of some strong coffee and some food for Abby who looked like she hadn't eaten in weeks.


End file.
